Best Restroom Poems

strange name for a pet yeah?
but that's what I call it
and it knows its name
so we get along OK
...

I'd seen her in the pub from time to time -
shortish height, slightly awkward jerky movements
not quite to be called boyish
like her haircut,
...

i stand before...you
as you ignore.....me
laying on the sofa, just watching t.v.
alone on the couch, as usual
...

Me, I prefer a long tale
with a happy ending,
said the python
glancing at the
...

I encountered one day
in a little café
a chum from days gone by,
and oh, what a treat
...

I’ve started a 'showcase' on my PoemHunter site,
which is NOT a contest; it’s no arena for a fight,
but instead a place where once a month I shall post..
a poem* from you, a PH member, which you’d like read most.
...

Graduation Day was today after school
school got out early
all of the future Freshmen
had to report to the High School Gymnasium
...

I was thinking….

I haven’t heard from my friend Kowalski, it has been at least a year, probably longer.
Last time he messaged me he and his pet companion a cockroach named Caldwell
...

One mic... one shot.
One chance at 'make or break'
One shot to get your voice out
One.... more minute please as I sit and let my breath out.
...

If someone is at my home and they need to piss
Whether they are a mister or a miss,
Maybe it's my father or my mother or my brother or sis
To allow them to use my toilet, I will not ever dismiss.
...

...

The sounds coming from the employee restroom.
Made the employees still like stone.
Because of Kristoff's extremely loud groans.
He sounded like he was in pain.
...

November 9th of this year while the International Space Station swayed
2 Cosmonauts took a spacewalk and history was made.
...

Came across the acronym RAS, looked
it up, time dilation - I stood transfixed by
the delight of what I came across:
...

get up from bed
use the restroom
go downstairs for breakfast
run to get the phone
...

There was one point in my life
when I was doing nothing but bad
the worst thing that came out of it
were the experiences that I had.
...

I still feel
his scent
lingering on my skin
when I close my eyes.
...

expressive
indecisive
repulsive
corrupt
...

Phat chance! Phish phophy! Bull Stool!
And Folks… Leave politics da phuuck…
out of this discussion! Not one human
life… is worth you, or any other mfer'
...

Is the jail a retreat
for the hired hooligans
to escape from revenge
and revive their trade later?
...

Balcony and sky

Small is my place;
For myself with thousands of heroes and villains
...

Slipping away is the time; seconds pass slowly like a racing tortoise
The clock never seemed to be less alive, dead
Is it true about, just a mechanism of illusion
To see a man frantically panicking
...

We have a drop-off problem in America.
We must decide which restroom
one can use when nature beckons.
So far, tumult reigns among the people.
...

As we know, sometimes we can see the big picture by peeking through a keyhole. And in America today perhaps we can see better the state of innocence among young children by looking at a recent incident in middle America.

A retired grammar school teacher, Thomas Thacker, is surprised at how "worldly" children are these days.
...

He was in the local bar restroom taking a piss.
When the urinal he happen to miss.
His piss landed on another bar patron's feet.
And his butt the patron wanted to beat.
...

The elephant trainer had to go to the restroom.
So he let Sally the elephant babysit his little girl for a minute.
He knew that his little girl would be safe.
No one would bother her.
...

He was on a long road trip.
And he stopped at a gas station to take a piss.
The attendant told him that he couldn't use the restroom.
It was off limits because of the virus.
...

The restroom has nice toilet paper.
That will not scratch his rump.
It is a good place for taking big dumps.
It doesn't smell too bad.
...

He had to use the restroom while in a store.
And the store clerk said no.
He told the clerk I really have to go.
Or I might piss on the floor.
...

He passes through the room like a bubble in champagne, unattached, teflon coated, and somehow freer than the rest of us. "Jordies here, " Leong says in an excited whisper.

"Yeah, " I sigh, adjusting my mask, "saw him." She smiles like a cat behind hers. Leong knows I'm crushing on Jordie and she finds it delicious information which she waves at me like a flag whenever he's around.
...

He was in Walmart and already in a rut.
When the store camera caught him scratching his butt.
He was scratching loud by the food.
And the customers thought that he was rude.
...

oh! we were waiting
for our turn to come
America is too slow
whatever they're doing
...

I was in one of these restroom
I wash my hands after each use
then I put my hand under blower
that stir everything around me
...

Atop that ridge live Inuit
Drinking and smoking weeds
No longer speak of tribal adage
No longer raise reindeer for sausage
...

i turn my bed sheet into red rose
not sure where it came; my nose
i didn't feel no pain nor discomfort
went to restroom breath hard none
...

Rictameter poem
syllables 2-4-6-8-10
and return.
...

and when you close your eyes again
it only grows larger.
does not that ridge on the horizon
resemble unseen breath.
...

Something like
NO PARKING
Is poetic to me
You are a soul
...

the giant mushroom
that mankind grows on
the sea
...

a house is built
made of bricks, red as blood
at the center of the island
black as a mole
...

a house is built
made of bricks, red as blood
at the center of the island
black as a mole
...

Freedom of you has been hijacked
In a country where you would get
No water free, no restroom free
And no place to sleep on free of cost.
...

The known hawks pounce by and blame me,
They nag of my faith and my books.
The final scud of light seizes back for me,
It hurls my rendering after the break
...

His soul slipped out of his body
and soared to God
as his body slipped into
the men's restroom.
...

I went to a Catholic hospital, but not for a day of rest
I went there instead to take a stress test,
They stuck me with a needle and then shaved my chest
So, then began my hours on a cardiovascular quest.
...

I read the paper when I want to read about the news,
But, when I want to read gossip about the ones who need to accuse,
I head to a local store or gas station and then I head to the toilet stall,
There I will look and I read what, is written upon the restroom wall.
...

Every public restroom has writings
Where?
On the walls of course.
Where else would one write?
...

If you want to find me,
I’ll soon be selling fireworks under
The desert sun,
Even if I am dying, out of water,
...

The tale I have to tell, children,
is not a pretty one – so,
PARENTAL SUPERVISION IS ADVISED;
though on the other hand,
...

The tale I have to tell, children,
is not a pretty one – so,
PARENTAL SUPERVISION IS ADVISED;
though on the other hand,
...

One day when we were shopping,
I really had to pee,
so Mom and I went looking
for a restroom just for me.
...

As I waited
Through the afternoon
In the Intensive Care section
Of the hospital,
...

Racists will always deny their contempt,
With the keeping of people reminded...
That one's appearance,
To them makes no difference.
...

For decades.
'D' With 'cades'...
Decades!
The homeless and those hungry,
...

I am not alone in consciousness.
With many who are also aware,
Of what does...
And what for them,
...

Could you survive,
Without a back to ride on?
No.
I don't think so.
...

What has become to be made acceptable,
As a part of everyday life to live?
Is the saying of one thing understood to be meant,
To then do another.
...

I remember when I was dating!
This revelation should expose one thing...
I take a pride in my memory!
...

Only fools will allow,
Malicious gossip to overhear.
Then spread it to whisper,
In other ears.
...

If I had not taken chances,
To adventure and explore...
This life to know it as mine,
I would find excuses to make...
...

For weeks we planned, finally some time to unwind,

A vacation dreamed of, a time just to relax.
...

The stench of the room
was that of spoiled raw fish.
Everyone was looking around,
searching for its host.
...

Chapter 31


*meet the parents + evil plan*
...

Whizzing poles made strange wind-tunes
Cool gusts from windows glided over my face
Coveted seat reserved with effort
On journey doze, can't waste even a minute!
...

So your the smart type
bookish in every right.
In science they created a letter
before A to give you a grade.
...

Deliberate late morning wake
sauntering lazily to the restroom
emptying my bowel of the residue of night before
while listening to Nimyel on Rhythm
...

Cell phones to the right,
Cell phones to the left,
Cell phones, cell phones,
everywhere I look.
...

A Daughter's Journey
Prologue
She didn't want the conversation to end; though they had discussed most of what she wanted. It had gone so well and she had so many questions. And so many things to tell him. She wanted to catch up on his life and to catch him up on hers. She really wanted to know how'd he been. What more could he tell her so that she could understand him better? She hadn't had a real conversation with him since she was 14; It was a conversation that she wanted to disappear from her memory. She wanted to get to know the man he had become since then. She realized though that now wasn't the best time. "Baby steps", she told herself as she looked at him. "This is the beginning. No need to push it." He must have noticed her struggling to find a way to say they'd talked for long enough. Smiling, he looked at her and asked, "Can I have a hug? "
She stood and as he approached to wrap his arms around her, she closed her eyes and hugged him back. It had been at least 2 years since they had last embraced and even in the years before that, she cringed inside as she reluctantly allowed him to hug her. She never hugged him back and whenever she'd allow him to, she felt her stomach in her throat. Today, though, she hadn't felt anything. In fact, she felt better than she had in a long time. She didn't want to let go, but she knew if she didn't she might begin to cry. She stepped back— and holding in her tears— she exhaled and smiled at him.
...

I’m a spoiled child, my dad is Bill
Our kingdom great, we masters of thrill…
My conception on a desktop, in a hard wheezing disk;
My delivery, through a window, dodging swine-virus risk;
...

Brain Dead

Beyond the flat line
I am awake
...

A place filled with people,
A horrid place to work,
A place filled with food of all sorts,
Where no one knows where it's been.
...

As the beep grows louder, I fiddle around for the snooze button
Because sleep is to me, what food is to a glutton!
I lazily slide out of bed, with a strange feel of mourning
O lord! Have mercy, its again Monday morning!
...

I Believe In Nature
I Believe In World
I Believe In Living
I Believe In Death
...

If on the throne for a while
You might need to sit
To wonder and ponder
For more than a flit
...

My voice is low and sober
Without the benign breathe
Of this gentle nous
That led my rod of knowledge
...

Ah! Four walls, one ceiling, one floor,
a window, two doors, one restroom
no bed, tons of roaches, one chair
no ashtrays, no TV, no radio
...

You pick me up after class,
You give me a kiss

You say we are seeing your family,
...

A life charm, a heart charm
Can potion your senses like truth.
...

I awake in my own bedroom,
Have I been in here before?
I need to use the restroom,
But I cannot find the door.
...

Sweating in the public restroom stall
While perusing the inscriptions on the wall
I discovered a gal named Robin
Is extremely skilled at bobbin
...

I walk down halls, busy, booming,
desolate-through endless crowds
of individuals, mating, mocking,
laughing at the bearded woman who
...

One bedroom, fuzzy television screen
Analytical transparant ending scene
Criminal tendencies attract a muddled vacancy room with pending keyes
Rent is free, step into scattering patterns of transcending speed
...

The lady so real.
Who gave you her life.
She worked so hard for you and into the night.

You needed her car and all of her dime.
As you worked and lived you never had time.
...

People who have not been able to
Put up with a face
Makes faces.
...

I met her in a restroom
I walked in by mistake, (lied)
I was searching for some pri-va-cy,
...

When first I heard the bell toll,
And felt the edges in liberty crack,
Cold ringing swarmed the fat of my soul,
Chilling me,
...

Awake Up!
He's chain to the bed with whiplashes from his past addictions.
Awake up my Son!
He wakeup with a puddle of sweat blinded from the reality.
...

...

...

Bee Movie Script - Dialogue Transcript
Voila! Finally, the Bee Movie script is here for all you fans of the Jerry Seinfeld animated movie. This puppy is a transcript that was painstakingly transcribed using the screenplay and/or viewings of the movie to get the dialogue. I know, I know, I still need to get the cast names in there and all that jazz, so if you have any corrections, feel free to drop me a line. At least you'll have some Bee Movie quotes (or even a monologue or two) to annoy your coworkers with in the meantime, right?

And swing on back to Drew's Script-O-Rama afterwards - because reading is good for your noodle. Better than Farmville, anyway.
...

Anybody Home?


Jimmy lived in a box underneath a bridge
...

History told us nothing about this history of slaughter as two lives changed the course of history.

Shining shoes for wages of the day and now he is faced with a war waged on the color of his skin.
...

ever take your girl out to dinner?
to a 5 star restaurant?
for no particular reason?
just because?
...

You would be
a sensation in Cuba
my demure little geisha
among those old tarts
...

Each year I would tried to do something for them, whether it was buying them a book, letting them work on the computer, buying them toys that I thought would help develop a sport that they would like to indulge in one day; I figured if I were in Austin, and because we are a close family, that I would like to, even should help them with as much as possible. Especially when looking back in retrospection; seven and ten years from now, I thought then, when they would graduate from high school and begin to go out on their own, and look back, I would like to be able to have helped them and be able to have made some type of a difference; academic or moral investment in their lives; something I was thinking about when I started to keep a journal on them several years ago. When they would reach eighteen and nineteen, no matter what happened or what road they would take, had I done the little that I could to try and help them. As I said; Desiree was seven, three years younger than Joshua, and up until recently, she probably still does try to imitate Joshua, which is good, for Joshua is nice intelligent and respectful. And Barbara Jean; their mom kept as you would say, 'A close eye on them'. Therefore they can be good peer role models for each other.

The last time I was by my sister's place; which was about ten years ago; one day I woke up early; which when driving a twenty-four hour period, day after day and month after month, which I was at that time while driving OTR (Over The Road) , can either be early or late, and heard what I thought was Barbara Jean, my older sister getting dressed, but minutes later heard my mom say 'Joshua are you ready yet'; and about half an hour later heard him say to his little sister, ‘bye Desiree, which she doesn't have to be to school until eight o'clock because it's only a block away. She, my mom, usually gets up and watches Barbara Jean walk out to the car, as a safety courtesy; her husband goes to work just a little bit earlier, and thus, they, my mom, sister, her daughter and son are there alone; a house where women and children live, safety and courtesy becomes somewhat of a necessity and not a burden.
...

In California we went to the dive bar and I lost my wallet

I remember falling into it

And maybe kissing against someone's garage
...

—For Penny Arcade

There must be a piece of art near where you live that you enjoy, even LOVE! A piece of art that IF THERE WAS WAR you would steal it and hide it in your little apartment. I'm going to PACK my apartment TO THE ROOF when war comes! This exercise needs 7 days, but not 7 consecutive days as most museums and galleries are not open 7 days a week. At the Philadelphia Museum of Art hands the Mark Rothko "Orange, Red and Yellow, 1961" a painting I would marry and cherish in sickness and in health, have its little Rothko babies, and hang them on the wall with their father. But I'm not allowed to even touch it! The security guards will think you're as weird as they think I am when you come for 7 days to sit and meditate. Never mind that, bribe them with candy, cigarettes or soda, whatever it take to be left in peace. For 7 days I sat with my dearest Rothko.

Bring binoculars because you will get closer to the painting than anyone else in the room! Feel free to fall in love with what you see, you're a poet, you're writing a poem, go ahead and fall in love! Feel free to go to the museum restroom and touch yourself in the stall, and be sure to write on the wall that you were there and what you were doing as everyone enjoys a dedication in the museum. And be certain to leave your number, you never know what other art lover will be reading. Return with your binoculars. There is no museum in the world with rules against the use of binoculars, information you may need for the guards if you run out of cigarettes and candy.

Map your 7 days with physical treats to enhance your experience: mint leaves to suck, chocolate liqueurs, cotton balls between your toes, firm-fitting satin underwear, thing you can rock-out with in secret for the art you love. Take notes, there must be a concentration on notes in your pleasure making. Never mind how horrifying your notes may become, horror and pleasure have an illogical mix when you touch yourself for art. When you gather your 7 days of notes you will see the poem waiting in there. Pull it out like pulling yourself out of a long and energizing dream.

ROTHKO 7

Whether things wither or whether your ability to see them does.
—from "The Coinciding,' by Carrie Hunter

DAY 1

it's
October
I pressed
this buttercup in April
I DON'T CARE WHAT YOU THINK
call me it!
call me sentimental!
HAVE YOU SEEN THE HEADLINES?
spring is a
luxury
I hope
for another to
garden with my
bare hands

DAY 2

awkwardness of being insane
arrives
after
diagnosis
not before
remove description
from the splendor
do not hesitate

DAY 3

more of a ghost
than my ghosts
here I am

DAY 4

tablet on tongue
stray voltage catching
my ankles

ready to marry
the chopped
off head

while elaborate in curse
it contributes evidence
of life

DAY 5

he kissed me while
I sang
refrain shoved
against epiglottis

centuries of a vowel for
endless refutable corrections
puts mouth
to want

DAY 6

songs dying bodies sing at
involuntary
junctures of
living

EXIT sign
leads us to empty
launch pad
walking
maybe
walking
maybe or riding
the collapsing tower

big hands of
big clock missing
this is not symbolism
they were gone

DAY 7

I'm not tearing back
curtains looking
I know Love is
on the other
side of
town

burying the leash
with the dog was
nothing but
cruel don't ever
speak to me again
help me stop
dreaming your
destruction
...

i am the captain of this ship, as the rain pours, i feel my tears run down my face, all is lost. the waves toss me back and forth as if they where alive
...

All the luscious fragrances tend to fill the room-
Lights so bright and cheerful chase away the gloom,
Tree bedecked in tinsel, to children, oh, so dear!
It is the Christmas season, a special time of year.
...

Every drop of ink I use-
Is like a drop of blood…
A bit of essence of myself-
A seeming, endless flood.
...